Mister Eclectic (howeird) wrote,
Mister Eclectic
howeird

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Sideways

Popped this loser DVD into the machine, and have one thing to say: Fast Forward is my best friend.

Someone who knows way too much about wine and whining combined the two into a single character, and some idiot director cast this guy to play the part who looks and sounds like a gay zombie on 'ludes.

It's a buddy road trip movie. The road trip is lame - it's SoCal wine country for the week before protagonist #2's wedding. #2 is an actor who used to be on a soap, but now mostly does voice-overs because he has a face which looks like he broke out of prison by slamming his face against the bars.

His goal for the week is to get laid. And not too far into the flick, his goal expands to include getting his buddy laid. Buddy #1 was divorced by the love of his life two years earlier, and is still in mourning.

The only good thing about this movie is Sandra Oh, who plays the wine-smart hottie whom Bachelor #2 sets his sights on. Virginia Madsen is passable as the way-too-intelligent-for-a-waitress waitress who wants to hook up with Bachelor #1, on account of she grew up in a winery and he speaks Wine as a second language.

I won't blow the ending for those who haven't seen this turkey, but suffice to say my reaction was "in your dreams, Mr. Playwright."

Some folks told me this was a film about a fellow with writer's block. Though the main character is a writer, and he's waiting for word about a manuscript being accepted for publication, the movie has nothing to do with that. He could just as well be a used car salesman waiting for a potential customer to come in and buy the car. Or a software engineer expecting a better offer. And bachelor #2 could be anything at all which would make his face recognizable to the general public. Come to think of it, even that is not necessary if they modified one little scene which hinges on it.
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