While I'm waiting, I found this gem:
From: firstname.lastname@example.org (Skid/Jos)
There have been an average of 160,000 troops in theater (IRAQ) during the
last 22 months, which has a firearm death rate of *60* per *100,000*.
The rate in Washington D.C. is *80.6* per *100,000*.
That means that you are 25% more likely to be shot and killed in our Nation's
Capitol, which has some of the strictest gun control laws in the nation,
than you are in Iraq.
*Conclusion*: We should immediately pull out of Washington, D.C.
And now for the scary part. The cable company I'm on hold for is the same one this fellow's email account is with.